Friday, September 26, 2014

Old work. I posted a bunch of my old work to tumblr for no other reason than the fact that I had found some really old CD back ups (circa 1999) and was surprised they still worked. I was really bad at keeping records of my stuff back then and most of the scans were poorly made at 72 dpi. So I did a kind of cautionary tale for other artists telling them to do a better job than I did of documenting their own stuff. Posts arehere andhere. What surprised the crap out of me was that a lot of people, well, a lot for ME glommed onto those. I got more notes and new followers for those two posts than just about anything else. These days, I struggle to get to 5 likes on tumblr. Thing is, when I was doing the art in those two posts fifteen years ago, I was getting pretty much the same reaction then for what I get now; passing dismissal. I have no idea what to do with or about this. I like some of the old work, some of it I think is rather lacking. Doesn't matter; I don't draw like that any more. Or paint. I tried doing a little sketch in one of the old styles after I posted yesterday and it just felt wrong. I had pretty much no connection to it at all.

I always seem to do things backwards; I started with the abstract and moved slowly towards a more realistic, though still distorted general approach. Speaking with a friend about this, he claims that I'm an outlier, that I was ahead of the game. I don't know if I agree with him, mostly as my fear of ego won't let me. Still, what do I do with this? Nothing, I guess. What's left of these works are just stacks of paintings, some damaged beyond repair, that line my closet. I guess it's nice that people like them, I just wish I could get this kind of response for something I've done recently. Or perhaps I could get people to read Tamino and talk to me about it. It's very troubling. As is always the case, I can't just make something to please someone else. It feels twisted and wrong. So I guess I just enjoy the fact that, for a brief moment, some people I've never met nor will ever meet liked some of my old work well enough to let me know and move on. What else can I do?

1 comment:

Behemoth media said...

this has kind of a tarot card look to it to me. The rest are all good, I loved the rhino. Likes online are deceiving. People tend to say they don't like things much more than they say they like them. It's hard to know, how many people are really looking and liking them in any real world sense. They might get attention because they are from another period, but I see a lot of improvement in your work. You can only go forward in time so keep going!